Complaints, Grievances, and Miscellaneous Ramblings

I'm supposed to meet with members of my Science Fiction class tonight. We're discussing the "group research project" which involves the creation of a website dedicated to various Sci-Fi authors.

Brett, I know you liked Simon as a professor, but I think this might be the worst class I've had in a while. Hardly anyone wants to offer anything in the discussions, and when they actually do, you tend to wish they hadn't.

Most people in this class were apparently pulled out of a StarTrek convention so they could be cast as extras in the latest Revenge of the Nerds film, and this course must be something they do in their spare time when they aren't shooting the movie. The distressing part is that some have evidently been deprived of their normal dosage of Ritalin.

Look - I like science fiction. I read a lot of sci-fi books growing up. Arthur C. Clarke (who is not featured in the class, because for some reason we're only focusing on American writers) is one of my favorite authors. Kurt Vonnegut is regarded by many as a science fiction writer. 1984 would probably be considered science fiction, as would Huxley's Brave New World. However, the people in this class are just too much to take sometimes. I can handle funny-looking people, but usually there's not much in the way of intelligent discussion.

At least five people punctuate each sentence they speak with "like, you know - like sort of like a - you know - like - yeah - like, totally" and I want to shoot them...
Then I realize there's probably too many of them and that they would like totally like, you know, probably like totally overpower me with their like totally telekinetic like powers...like, yeah.
So it would probably be quicker just to shoot myself instead.

The professor has seemingly been influenced by this, because his level of speech tends to deteriorate the longer we're in class. His efforts to pry meaningful commentary out of the group are often laughable. Maybe not so much the effort, but certainly the results. Typically we'll sit in silence until someone just gets too hyper and their furious leg spasms are no longer a sufficient outlet for the pent-up energy of their ADHD. Then the nonsensical words just pour forth and we're all gasping for air over the rising wave of shitty analysis that has just been spewed out.

So many comments have caused me to bow my head and bite my lip in an attempt to stifle my laughter. Today before class began, the president of the 'Sci-Fi & Fantasy Gamers' Guild' (nope, I'm not making that up) was aghast that so few people from the class had shown up for the last meeting. He has now made two or three announcements in class about meeting times and seems genuinely puzzled that he hasn't gained any new recruits.

The entire class is on Listserv, which is essentially a mailing list for the course. Everyone is subscribed, so when someone sends a message, everyone gets it. When we were informed of this procedure the first day of class, a very excited girl with an underbite piped up about a program some professors use called Blackboard. She advocated the use of Blackboard either instead of, or in addition to Listserv. She seemed like she was getting rather wet just talking about Blackboard...her speech quickened and she became flushed as she related the joy, wisdom, and convenience of discussion boards, 'digital drop boxes,' and on and on.

Professor Simon, who initially showed no interest in modifying his standard Listserv procedure, could not resist such an impassioned plea and was ultimately forced to create a Blackboard account for the class. Now besides the multitude of stupid and pointless emails going through the Listserv (and consequently into my Inbox) and the course website - which is updated at an alarming pace with pages and pages of information I will never, ever read - we're now responsible for checking the announcements on the Blackboard site.

Quite the cast of characters. The disheartening thing is that this 200-level English class occupies just as much time - if not more - than the 300- and 400-level History classes (which is my actual major) I'm taking. Twelve books to go through in a 15-week semester. The reading's not enough, however. We also have to do all this outside work on the freaking website that no one in the real world (but perhaps in the world of the Sci-Fi/Fantasy Gamers' Guild) will ever visit. Absolutely maddening.

Freedom Fries

Robert Plant, in what looks to be his most political lyrics since Fate of Nations... in the song "Freedom Fries" from the upcoming Mighty Rearranger:

The father, son and the Holy Ghost
Took the last train to the coast
They were moving fast, they were raising sand
They were running wild in the promised land

The father, son and the three wise men
Operating undercover out in Bethlehem
Will they heal the sick?
Can they raise the dead?
Can they bring it on home like the Good Book says?

Billy the Kid told the Prince of Thieves,
A little give and take to satisfy my needs
You can give me lots but I'll take some more
I got my eyes on your treasure 'neath the desert floor

Freedom fries and burns and scars
The liberator goes too far
Freedom fries and screams and yells
The promised land is promised Hell

Paying For Someone Else's Hard-On

Do you think programs like Medicare should cover erectile dysfunction drugs?

I'm not sure I really have much of an opinion on this. I know the drug companies are making a ton on this, but then again - they're making a ton on everything. I just wish they could keep the thousands of ads down to a minimum.

People worry abut their young children asking what 'erectile dysfunction' means, but have they considered what it's like for a guy in his 20s to be watching the news with his grandparents when the commercial comes on and says, "erections lasting more than four hours, though rare, require immediate medical attention..."?

Read the article and see what you think.

Hunter S. Thompson Dies

Thompson, seen here with Johnny Depp.

Visionary author Hunter S. Thompson has killed himself. You might have known him as part of the golden age of Rolling Stone or as the author of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. He was certainly a Kerouac follower, and definitely lived the On The Road lifestyle for many years.

Here's an article he wrote during the 2004 campaign, after the debates.

He will be missed.

Robert Plant Tracks - Links Should Work Now

UPDATE - New Links

Shine It All Around - good solid song - excellent bassline. Sounds like a drum loop at the beginning. I'll leave someone else to point out that the drums evoke memories of a certain song on Zep's fourth album.

Enchanter - probably the best track of the three. I dig that solo.

Somebody Knocking - weakest of the three, in my opinion. Rambling, never really takes off.

From French radio on Real Player (quality's not the best, but you'll get the idea), as described in an earlier post. Not sure if the links will work for everyone. I'll leave them up for a week or two, so if you're interested, get them while you can.

If you like them, buy Mighty Rearranger when it comes out May 3rd.

JPJ & Dave Grohl

John Paul Jones will be featured on the next Foo Fighters album, due for release in June.

Here's the text of an article Dave Grohl wrote for Rolling Stone magazine last April:

Led Zeppelin

By Dave Grohl

Heavy metal would not exist without Led Zeppelin, and if it did, it would suck.

Led Zeppelin were more than just a band -- they were the perfect combination of the most intense elements: passion and mystery and expertise. It always seemed like Led Zeppelin were searching for something. They weren't content being in one place, and they were always trying something new.

They could do anything, and I believe they would have done everything if they hadn't been cut short by John Bonham's death. Zeppelin served as a great escape from a lot of things. There was a fantasy element to everything they did, and it was such a major part of what made them important. Who knows if we'd all be watching Lord of the Rings movies right now if it wasn't for Zeppelin. They were never critically acclaimed in their day, because they were too experimental and they were too fringe.

In 1968 and '69, there was some freaky shit going on, but Zeppelin were the freakiest. I consider Jimmy Page freakier than Jimi Hendrix. Hendrix was a genius on fire, whereas Page was a genius possessed. Zeppelin concerts and albums were like exorcisms for them. People had their asses blown out by Hendrix and Jeff Beck and Eric Clapton, but Page took it to a whole new level, and he did it in such a beautifully human and imperfect way. He plays the guitar like an old bluesman on acid. When I listen to Zeppelin bootlegs, his solos can make me laugh or they can make me tear up. Any live version of "Since I Been Loving You" will bring you to tears and fill you with joy all at once. Page doesn't just use his guitar as an instrument. For him, it's like some sort of emotional translator.

John Bonham played the drums like someone who didn't know what was going to happen next -- like he was teetering on the edge of a cliff. No one has come close to that since, and I don't think anybody ever will. I think he will forever be the greatest drummer of all time. You have no idea how much he influenced me. I spent years in my bedroom -- literally fucking years -- listening to Bonham's drums and trying to emulate his swing or his behind-the-beat swagger or his speed or power. Not just memorizing what he did on those albums but getting myself into a place where I would have the same instinctual direction as he had. I have John Bonham tattoos all over my body -- on my wrists, my arms, my shoulders. I gave myself one when I was fifteen. It's the three circles that were his insignia on Zeppelin IV and on the front of his kick drum.

"Black Dog," from Zeppelin IV, is what Led Zeppelin were all about in their most rocking moments, a perfect example of their true might. It didn't have to be really distorted or really fast, it just had to be Zeppelin and it was really heavy.

Then there's Zeppelin's sensitive side -- something people overlook, because we think of them as rock beasts, but Zeppelin III was full of gentle beauty. That was the soundtrack to me dropping out of high school. I listened to it every single day in my VW bug, while I contemplated my direction in life. That album, for whatever reason, saved some light in me that I still have.

I heard them for the first time on AM radio in the Seventies, right around the time that "Stairway to Heaven" was so popular. I was six or seven years old, which is when I'd just started discovering music. But it wasn't until I was a teenager that I discovered the first two Zeppelin records, which were handed down to me from the real stoners. We had a lot of those in the suburbs of Virginia, and a lot of muscle cars and keggers and Zeppelin and acid and weed. Somehow they all went hand in hand.

To me, Zeppelin were spiritually inspirational. I was going to Catholic school and questioning God, but I believed in Led Zeppelin. I wasn't really buying into this Christianity thing, but I had faith in Led Zeppelin as a spiritual entity.They showed me that human beings could channel this music somehow and that it was coming from somewhere. It wasn't coming from a songbook. It wasn't coming from a producer. It wasn't coming from an instructor. It was coming from somewhere else.

I believe Zeppelin will come back and prove themselves to once again be the greatest rock band of all time. It will happen. They'll find someone to play the drums and I'll be right there, front row at every goddamn show. Then I could finally die a happy man.

(From RS 946, April 15, 2004)

_______

So if you see me listening to some Foo Fighters CDs in the near future, you probably won't be surprised...

In all fairness, I really liked what I heard of their last record, and I enjoyed them when I saw them live on two different occasions.

There were rumors in 2003 around the release of DVD and How The West Was Won that Zeppelin would reform with Dave Grohl on drums. I didn't put much faith in that - there's a Zeppelin reunion story every year. But they could do a lot worse than Dave Grohl, especially since he so obviously cares about the music. It's nice to hear. And he's right about Since I've Been Loving You - what an incredible song.

A large amount of my time from age 16-20 or so was spent just trying to get my friends who were into 'newer' music to acknowledge the power and influence of Zeppelin in the bands they were listening to - so it's gratifying to hear people like Billy Corgan, Dave Grohl, Raine Maida, Art Alexakis, and others talk about how great Zeppelin is. Just a reaffirmation, I guess.

Robert Plant - Two Tracks from Mighty Rearranger previewed on French Radio

Courtesy of the frequently updated and always informative Tight But Loose Led Zeppelin website, I had the opportunity to check out the preview of Plant's new album (copy and paste this link into your Real Player if you're interested). A few comments...
I could be wrong, but contrary to what TBL says, it seems there are only two tracks from the album - the first single "Shine It All Around" was not played so far as I could tell. The time given (8:30) takes us into the latter part of "Enchanter," which starts somewhere around the 4:40-5:00 mark.
The composition of "Enchanter" sounds just great - the big drum sound overlayed with the great guitar work. A very cool song. A few quibbles though...the vocals sound like those on Dreamland (2002). I like Dreamland, but I REALLY think Robert sounds much better live than he has on the last two albums he's put out (1998's Walking Into Clarksdale with Jimmy Page and Dreamland). The production, which is at least partially, if not primarily credited to him, makes his voice sound thin and much weaker. I understand a desire to have that breathy, whisper-like quality on some songs, but it seems to appear on the majority. I've seen Robert on five occasions since 2001, and each time I've come away impressed with the way he sounded. There are breaks in his voice occasionally - like on "In The Light" from 2001 - but overall, he still had power and sounded really great in the lower and middle ranges (keep in mind he's 56 years old).
I remember being disappointed when I heard "If I Ever Get Lucky" from Dreamland. Although still a strong song, Robert sounded quite a bit different singing it for the studio version than he had when I first heard the song in May 2001 in Boston's Orpheum Theater. "Hey Joe" was another big letdown after hearing it live. I just don't think Plant's vocals have been captured effectively. It almost seems like he's holding back, and there's no reason for it. Perhaps it was understandable when he left out the "loooooove" scream (and indeed, the whole last section) of "Whole Lotta Love" on VH1 Storytellers - perhaps he didn't want a vocal 'break' captured for a television audience...I don't know - it's not like it was a live broadcast. But with the luxury of multiple takes in a studio, one would think it would give him more opportunity to get the best effort saved for digital posterity. I also understand that Clarksdale, under the direction of Steve Albini (who produced Nirvana, among other grunge bands), might have a certain sound to it. I like the album, but all the songs did much better when they were performed live - "When The World Was Young" and especially the beautiful "Heart in Your Hand." I'm not sure if "Sons of Freedom" was ever done live, but I always thought Robert sounded horrendous on that track.
Side note here - the general riff on "...Lucky" is taken almost verbatim from the first or second track on the Desert Road Justin Adams CD that was sold at some of Plant's 2002 gigs (Justin Adams is probably the member of Plant's Strange Sensation with the most creative influence. He plays guitar most of the time with Plant, but on Desert Road, he played all instruments and sang).
I just popped the "Morning Dew" single from Dreamland in, with the live version of "A House is Not a Motel," to see if that was any better - but it's not a great song to use for comparison.

The songs on Clarksdale are usually described as sounding "unfinished" because of the use of so many early takes. With another producer, things might have been different. One of the strongest songs, and one of the few originals on Plant's 2002 release (Dreamland was mostly a covers album), was "Dirt In a Hole," and that was left off the US release. I had to order a copy of the album from Amazon's UK site in order to get that song (it would later be available on the greatest hits/B-sides album Sixty-Six to Timbuktu as well). It should be understood that I'm not displeased with the songs on Dreamland - really just the production. I think it could sound better. However, after the early Zep years of screaming over three guys who were cranked up to '11' (see Spinal Tap) without a proper PA, is it any wonder now that Robert is in charge of the production that he prefers to whisper in our ears and just bring his own voice to the front of the mix? I guess not.

Any opinions on how much difference a producer can make? They pretty much determine the sound of the album - whether the drums are clear or compressed, whether the vocals are up front or buried in the mix, if the bass is a significant part of the song or just something you might notice in the background if you really search for it.

The second track available on the broadcast is "Somebody Knocking." Listening to it, I kept waiting for it to take off. I was pretty disappointed. I hope Robert doesn't think this is one of the stronger tracks on the album, because it lacks quite a bit in my opinion. I really dig the Middle-Eastern influence in Zeppelin, in Robert's work, and in the work of the bands that Zep has influenced (like The Tea Party - see their Edges of Twilight album). The Unledded (1994 with Jimmy Page for MTV Unplugged) project was great in large part due to the guys Plant called the "Egyptian Pharaohs" (Middle-Eastern musicians lead by Hossam Ramsey).

I heard a band in 2001 with Paul at our local Blue Heron festival called Turku that I thought was fantastic (they reminded me so much of the middle section of the Unledded-era "Kashmir" that I kept expecting them to break into a cover of that song, "Friends," or "Four Sticks") and I bought the only two albums of theirs that I could find...However, Plant's recent habit of laying old blues lyrics over Middle-Eastern music has now reached the point of being overdone.
Maybe repeated listenings will help, but the only really intelligible lyrics I heard were taken whole from the blues classic "Crawling King Snake." My first impression was one of boredom. It may have been alleviated had the song actually 'taken off' or changed direction a little. Alas, it did not.
Maybe I'll change my mind when the album comes out. When I first heard "Funny In My Mind (Believe I'm Fixin to Die)" from Dreamland, I was less than enthused about the accordion-like keyboard sound, but I got to like that a little.

All that said, I think "Enchanter" sounds like a song I'll have on REPEAT by May 4, the day after the album's release here. I hope Rearranger gets some good press and a little airplay. It seems as if every year, the media drags an aging superstar back into the limelight and they get their day in the sun (again) with a bunch of airplay on "adult contemporary" radio stations, an armful of Grammys, and a little overdue respect (see Steely Dan, Bruce Springsteen, Bob Dylan, et cetera).

Bull

Educational and amusing.

Case Closed

Matt finally weighed in on what actually happened at the New Year's Party, and since he was the target of my alleged assault, I believe we can consider the matter closed - which means I can stop having to respond to this crap.

While I do feel somewhat vindicated (again), it does not allay the anger I feel about the various comments that have been made and the things that were implied about me. I'll get over it though.

I can only be loved and adored by so many people.

Fantastic

Emphasis added -

Amy said...
Wendy, bottom line is this. You aren't the one who FIRST told me the story. I was the one who asked you if the "incidents in question" really happened. So don't think you did anything wrong, because you didn't!
It upset me when I heard the story because I know what a nice guy Matt is and how much crap he's been through with his leg. And I know how Wyatt gets - and could only imagine how much worse he must act under the influence.

I wasn't there, so I shouldn't have commented on things I wasn't present for. I'm sorry.
This whole thing is such a big weird mess.
______________________________________

Another cryptic way of "setting the record straight" by (again) not telling us who provided her with the original (horribly warped) version of the night's events. And then a great testimonial about my behavior (which is apparently something like that of a steroid-user on cocaine).

I can't expect anyone to refute these allegations. This is the kind of intelligent, incisive look at my personality that I've always longed for, and now I'm truly finding out who I really am. I can't imagine a better analysis.

Ah, the power of the internet. The freedom and security to say things to and about people you would rarely, if ever, say to them in person. I really try not to engage in that sort of thing.
I'm fairly blunt in person, and I try to write exactly as I would speak. I don't pander, side-step, or avoid the issues at hand.

Anyway - I wonder how far this would go if we all had to talk to each other face to face. Granted, I think both Wendy and I will go further than others in saying straight out what we think - but even then, it seems like this would be resolved by now and that we could all agree on a single, standard version of what actually transpired. And hopefully that version would resemble the truth, which is that I never hit Matt in the leg on that night or any other. I'm not sure that such a roundtable discussion would involve anyone who was not present that night. It would necessitate an invitation to the mystery person who gave Amy the story of my supposed assault. I'll admit I am now mildly curious as to whom this might be.

Hopefully, this will be the end of it, but we can never tell what people are going to come up with next in their continuing desire to 'set the record straight' by obscuring it further. Gotta love it. In a helpful and appreciated comment under the "Meet Wyatt..." post, Thom has given his version of the night in question. You might know Thom as Matt's good and loyal friend for a period of many years. Amazingly, Thom has yet to realize the destructive power of my aggressive personality. In fact, despite many warnings, Thom hung out with me last night. We went to a party where alcohol was served. There were no fights. There was a certain team who won three consecutive games of beer pong, but (in an effort to 'set the record straight') I won't mention any names.

Krugman Column - Class War

More evidence of the Bush Administration helping the rich get richer and the poor get poorer.

Meet Wyatt - Lacking Self-Control and Smacking His Friends Around - since 1981

I've calmed down a little bit now. I talked to Matt, and he's going to try to post something to confirm what actually happened by Monday or so. He's at home right now and his computer's at his Fredonia apartment.

You may have noticed that I've been advised to "let it go," but it really seems like silence would be an admission of guilt, right? Frequently, Matt will just come up to me while in the course of hanging out and punch me on the shoulder or in the chest. I usually hit him back, but this is not a violent exchange, and I don't engage in any Tonya Harding tactics. It's a stupid thing that guys do. I have no other explanation for that, but I can tell you that it is seldom if ever initiated by me. If and when I do hit Matt back, he will frequently feign injury in the same sarcastic way that he normally behaves. He's one of my best friends, and we play off each other well when in conversation by ourselves or with others. It's a good dynamic, but it does include making jokes at the other's expense on occasion.

I really don't remember any smacking around happening at the New Year's Eve party, but it's possible that it was so minor that we (Matt and I) both forgot it. Bottom line is that I never hit Matt in the leg.

Another note - when Matt decides to fuck with somebody, it's usually a complete and well-conducted job. He said something to Loretta a few years ago, to which she replied, "your mom..." Matt's response was to tell Loretta that his mother was deceased, and she believed him for more than a few HOURS, feeling awful of course. It wasn't until much later that she found out he was just screwing with her and she didn't take it well.

In other words, he doesn't say something with a straight face, wait till it's been accepted as fact, and then break into a smile right away. He might let you go on believing it for minutes, hours, days, or weeks. He's good at it.

If you read my original post, I talk about how Matt was at my apartment when Aaron called and told us that Amy told him that I had smacked him around. We were both incredulous. And I still am.

I'm not going to go into an expansive history of how Amy and I have gotten along or not gotten along. I considered it, but it would take a while. Suffice it to say that in high school, I thought she was annoying and she thought I was a jerk. I felt bad about the way I had treated her, and made attempts to make peace with her in late 2002/early 2003 before I left for Colorado. I apologized for being such a jerk. In August of 2003, we got along really well when I came home from Colorado for Laura and Randy's wedding. And I think that's where things stood until she forwarded a couple emails to a large group, of which I was one receipient. The first one - a long diatribe about how bad the Clintons were - upset me but I decided not to reply. The second one was, as I said earlier, a play on the Ant/Grasshopper fable with the theme of ridiculing government programs/services for minorities (like Affirmative Action) and the poor. I was ticked off. First of all, I really hate forwarded mail. Secondly, the whole premise of the email was dumb. If I got something like that now, I would probably post the whole thing on this blog and then pick it apart. Instead, I hit 'Reply-All.' I did take a minor shot at Amy in the reply, but I did so in what I thought to be a fairly good-natured way, playing on her (self-proclaimed - many, many times during high school and also JCC [I heard Amy's devotion to Taye Diggs more times than I could possibly count]) fondness for black men - which is fine. I don't have a problem with it and never implied there was anything wrong with it. I also used an ebonics expression somewhat mockingly (bling-bling). Was this the right thing to do? Well, maybe and maybe not. It certainly depended on who you chose to ask. I actually got two very positive replies from two people that were on the list of original receipients to which Amy had sent the email. I was quite surprised. They were both girls from our class (Falconer '99) from whom I would not have expected a favorable reaction. I admired both of them in high school, but I was almost positive that one of the girls had even more negative feelings toward me than Amy ever did. I was pretty surprised, but I was happy. It bolstered my feeling that I had done the right thing by doing something other than rolling my eyes and hitting 'delete' when I got the email.

Well, needless to say, the email that I wrote put Amy and I back on terms very similar to those which we had been on in high school, and now you see the results: this mess.

I think I'm done now. It would be nice if Matt would post his own account of that night's events, but I've said my piece. Normal blogging will resume shortly.

Response to Follow

Right now, I don't have the time or anger to devote to a suitable response, but I will let you know what I'm stewing about.
In case you missed it, here is the post in question. When I post my response, I'm going to do my best to be civil, although I can't promise that I won't be sarcastic. It's almost too much for me to take.
Last night, I received this comment:
_________________________________
Anonymous said...
Hey Wyatt. It's Amy Gustafson - that evil girl who "makes up" cruel stories to make you look like a bad guy for no reason....

Just to set the record straight, it wasn't Wendy who shared this story with me, so don't flip out on her about it.

When I asked her about Turck's New Years party and if you had really nailed Matt in the chest and then pushed his bad leg - she actually gave me a milder version of what I had originally heard. So if anything - you should thank her for making you seem like LESS of an ass.

Matt and Wendy are probably two of the best friends you will ever have. Honestly, I don't see why you don't go out of your way to be nicer to them.

Whatever happened - it's over and done with. I just thought I'd set the record straight. And don't get me wrong - I don't hate you. I just don't know why people continue to hang around you when you treat them like crap all the time.

You really aren't a bad guy sometimes. I sincerely hope you can control yourself at Aaron & Nikki's wedding.

And, by the way, if I do end up bringing a date of another race or ethnicity, I'd appreciate you keeping your Affirmative Action jokes to yourself.

Thanks so much.
_________________________________

The Affirmative Action reference is to an email I sent in reply to a forwarded message involving a political parody of the ant/grasshopper fable sent to me by Amy. I still have the whole exchange on my home computer, and maybe I'll post it sometime. Right now I'm at school, and I wouldn't want to take anything out of context.

This entire thing seems so juvenile and ridiculous to me, and I suppose that when I post my response, I'm going to be playing right into that. I'm sorry, but I don't think I should just let this go. Obviously, someone wants to provoke me, since I don't believe I ever sent Amy the link to my blog and I doubt that she just happened to stumble on a post I made on January 15. If she's not getting this faulty account of events from Wendy, then the field of 'suspects' narrows even further. Apparently I should be thanking Wendy for making me look like "LESS of an ass" which is something that I will do here and now, and in fact I will extend that gratitude toward anyone who can possibly make me look like less of an ass (as we know, this is one of the most difficult jobs one can possibly have). The task of making me look like less of an ass is like being Press Secretary for President Bush, being in charge of odor-control in a field of cow manure, or scientific studies at the Tobacco Institute. Hey - it's tough. I realize that. And for that I thank you.

Yes, I know that seemed like a rebuttal, but I'm not done yet.

Bisignano on Kilimanjaro

Just got this email from my good friend Biz and wanted to share it with all my faithful readers. I also think John's feat deserves a little attention, given the fact that some jerk submitted a picture of himself a week or so ago to the worthless Post-Journal bragging about his climb. Perhaps I shouldn't blame the guy though - maybe his mom sent it in or something. Anyway, John did it with very little fanfare. I heard about his plans from someone else before I heard anything from John. So here's the email:
___________________
Hey Everyone! I just wanted to let you all know that the Kilimanjaro summit attempt was a success. It was an absolutely amazing experience that began at 6,500 ft in lush tropical rain forest and finished at the summit of Uhuru peak at 19,345 ft among glaciers and lunar-esque landscape. The actual hike itself, apart from being almost completely uphill, was actually at a nice slow pace, allowing us to have maximum energy for the 6th day, the summit attempt. The climb to the summit began at 15,000 ft where every breath was a slight struggle and the weather changed more often than my underwear. We started at midnight when the scree slope would be frozen, thus maximizing our traction and minimizing falling rocks. Plus, we would arrive at the summit right around sunrise. It was an extremely grueling climb that took over 6 hours in almost complete darkness. The stars were beautiful and the Southern Cross had me humming one of my favorite Crosby, Stills, & Nash songs. Honestly, the climb is almost a complete blur. I remember staring up the mountain into the darkness and only seeing other climbers' headlamps. They never disappeared. They only kept climbing. It was a little discouraging to look up so it was a little more comfortable to stare down. Plus, it was easier to follow the trail that way.

As we approached Stella Point, which is the saddle that leads to Uhuru, we realized that it was perfect timing. The eastern horizon was on fire and there was a sea of clouds just waiting to explode with the start of a new day. It was almost too cold to take pictures. The water in my nalgene bottle was frozen. We had another 45 minutes of hiking to reach the true summit, Uhuru, and the sign that marks the highest point in Africa. I guess there's not much more to say than it was an incredible experience. Seeing glaciers 3 degrees from the equator is a very exhilarating feeling. The 5 hour hike down the side of the mountain, on the other hand, was not. I didn't think it was possible to get blisters on the tops of your toes.

I hope that this message finds you all well and in good spirits. I will be back home around the 13th of february. I can't wait to catch up with everyone. Until then, Peace and love! And, Hakuna Matata (too bad Disney got a hold of that one).

-John

Ego-Stroking - Leading Me To Public Humiliation

I was asked this evening by a girl who has been in a few of my history and poli sci classes if I would be interested in taking part in a debate early next month. The debate would feature members of the various political groups at Fredonia (Dems, Republicans, Greens, and Libertarians) and be moderated by the Amnesty International group. The subject would be American foreign policy. I went to quite a few of the College Democrats meetings last semester before the election and volunteered for one of the local candidates. However, I found the meetings often conflicted with my schedule. When I did go, I was somewhat unimpressed by how much was actually accomplished. This is no one's fault in particular. This is a small school and I think political apathy on this campus is probably competitive with the worst levels nation-wide. I also find myself consistently to the left of most mainstream Democratic positions, and Kerry's defeat only pushed me further in that direction.
Anyway, this girl - I'll call her Stephanie because that's her name - said that I should really consider being part of the debate because she claimed that I was a "good speaker." I laughed and quickly pointed out that most good speakers do not find that their face becomes as red as mine does when I talk to/in front of people I don't know, just as it was turning progressively more red as I was talking to her. It should also be noted that when I talk in class, there is rarely any serious opposition from anyone who knows what they're talking about, which would presumably not be the case at such a debate. There is another danger as well, which is that my sources may not be as diverse as they should be and I would simply be echoing Noam Chomsky if the subject turned to international terrorism, for instance.
Another problem would be the question of representation. Am I just supposed to communicate the Democratic position? Would I be locked into stating the Democratic view on everything and having to argue for something I did not quite believe? And if not, then even the Green Party may find themselves outflanked to the left by many of the things I would have to say, which might be confusing to everyone.

One of the many reasons I will likely never be a politician - besides the fact that I do not have the money, status, oratory skills, or looks to make it - is my unwillingness to compromise on most issues. My strong stances on many aspects of domestic and foreign policy do not invite any types of bargaining that provide the grease for the political wheels of our system.

All of this aside, it is likely that I will allow myself to be dragged into this with visions of glorious triumph and the adoration of the masses in my mind - and proceed to make a fool of myself in front of a large group of people. I can't wait.

So True

This is a NYT article about distractions while working on the computer. And I'm posting this article because I was compelled to check the NYT website while in the midst of writing a paper. I'm sure you're not surprised, but it's nice to know people are devoting studies to this problem, which is referred to as 'pseudo-ADD' in the article.

Krugman Column

Yesterday's column - called "Spearing The Beast" focuses once again on Social Security.

Noam Chomsky Speech on Democracy Now

Over winter break, I read Noam Chomsky's Hegemony or Survival: America's Quest for Global Dominance. On today's Democracy Now broadcast, a speech he gave late last month is featured virtually in its entirety. Depending on your internet connection, you'll be able to listen to it or even to watch it. The speech is a rough overview of many of the themes he explores in the book.
The broadcast goes for an hour - this is not a news program that lives on soundbites - so if your attention span is limited and you haven't had your Ritalin today, it might be tough on you. However, if you can make it through, the knowledge itself will be a significant reward.

Liberal Migration?

Canada or Bust

It's really quite tempting, although I guess I'm one of those people who would like to change our country from the inside rather than just leaving. After all - how long until the US decides they need to invade Canada to increase national security?

The Reagan Years - A Continuation

I just returned home from class and checked the Times website. This article was part of the headlines. I haven't even read it yet, but I don't really need to.

The people behind Bush II are the same people who were behind Bush I, and they're the same people that were behind Reagan. Georgie W gets a lot of slack for being barely engaged in substantive policy debate and discussion, and also for being just a little lacking in the intellectual department. The truth is that Reagan was very much the same way. Although he was a much better speaker - he could skillfully spin things without stuttering through cliched expressions - Reagan was not a brilliant guy. We have much more to fear from those that lurk behind the scenes and actually construct the policies that the leaders are obliged to sell.

What's going on now, and what has been going on since 9/11, is simply a return to basic strategy by those working behind the scenes. Bush has sold us on war in perpetuity - the glorious "War on Terror." To paraphrase Orwell from his masterwork - 1984 (actually the same passage that concludes Fahrenheit 9/11, which was probably the best and most ominous part of that film) - it doesn't really matter who the enemy is, as long as there is an enemy. As long as the war continues, citizens will turn in their liberties willingly, believing that they are only doing their part - their patriotic duty. 9/11 was a necessary catalyst for those that truly hold the power behind the facade of our government. I'm not sure Clinton would have won if the Soviet Union still existed in 1992, and if Gorbachev hadn't brought in reforms like perestroika and glasnost, it's almost certain that Bush would have been granted a second term.

The true policy-makers need an external enemy. I'm talking here about the individuals that make up the "conservative think-tanks" that you hear about. They're not necessarily socially conservative, but they view the Bible-thumping horde as a useful tool - an ally to help them reach their objective. Of course the war on terror is a sham. The budget that Bush has submitted is heavy on military spending and it slashes social programs. Is anyone surprised? This perpetual war is a fantastic excuse to dump billions into the "military-industrial complex." More bombers, better bombs, more recruiters. See one of the sub-headings on the front page of the Times? It says U.S. Redesigning Atomic Weapons. It's an article about the aging US nuclear arsenal. Apparently, we need to upgrade many of our 10,000 warheads. Otherwise, we might find that they're not reliable - and we wouldn't want to find that out when we really "need" them.

When are we going to need them?

There were significant discussions about the viability of using "tactical nuclear weapons" in the Iraq war. The Deputy Assistant Secretary of Defense for “Forces Policy" under Rumsfeld is a guy named Keith Payne. In 1980, he co-authored a paper that appeared in Foreign Policy magazine. The article's title? "Victory is Possible." Essentially, the article's aim was to take the taboo out of using nuclear weapons in a pre-emptive first strike against the USSR. Here's a disturbing piece of the article: "an intelligent United States offensive strategy, wedded to homeland defenses, should reduce U.S. casualties to approximately 20 million … a level compatible with national survival and recovery."

What was the response to this kind of talk? Was Payne dismissed as psychotic and sent to an asylum? Of course not. Now he's helping to shape our national policy. Check this article out, because otherwise I'm going to be writing a lot that will just be paraphrasing. The article was written in May 2003, but the main points are still valid. Even though we didn't go nuclear in the Iraq war, there are people in important positions working to remove the stigma of using nuclear weapons in the future.

And we want other nations to get rid of their weapons of mass destruction? Why? Well, obviously it's because we're the only responsible nation - the one that can be trusted with such weapons to use them only when they're necessary. When are they necessary? Well, when we say they're necessary, of course.

Absurdity.

Well, I have some actual work to do, so I should get going on that.

Elaborate, please

I still haven't found the post for which this comment appears, but I can't devote time to a comprehensive search because I'm at work. The comment was this "...wyatt-- i also want to tell you that paul, steve, and i had a conversation tonight-- and we managed to narrow down our favorite thing about you-- your unfailing ability to describe things in a way that is only characterized by you."

Is this a reference to a unique way of describing events, or is it saying that only I would characterize certain events in the way I do? I'm not sure if this is good or bad.

Robert Plant's New Album Due in US on May 3rd

From www.tblweb.com - the definitive source for Led Zeppelin and Zeppelin-related news:

MIGHTY REARRANGER NEWS There was a short snippet about Robert's new album in Thursday's USA TODAY (with a new picture of Robert -- his hair is a tad shorter than the photo that appeared in January's MOJO). The release date for Mighty Rearranger in the US is set at May 3. It will feature 12 tracks. "We've made a very powerful record," says Plant, who says that new label Sanctuary, "can be a great help in pushing these songs out into the great big music machine."http://www.usatoday.com/life/2005-02-03-coming-attractions_x.htm

Don't be fooled by the trip-hop and Middle Eastern touches - Plant still rocks. Hard. (May)
Entertainment Weekly has a piece on Sanctuary Records with lots of tidbits about Plant's new album
ITS'S SO F---ING GOOD, IT'S OUTRAGEOUS," gushes Sanctuary Group CEO Merck Mercuriadis. "Actually, I should really play you something over the phone." He's raving about rock god Robert Plant's forthcoming solo CD, his first disc of original songs in 12 years. And like an excited schoolboy, he preempts our interview for a full five minutes to hold the phone against his stereo's speaker. Receiver buzz and all, the track's robust Led Zeppelin III--meets-- Ray of Light electro-lush charms leave a mighty fine impression. In fact, L2T wouldn't be at all surprised if Plant, following Morrissey's triumphant 2004 resurgence, is crowned 2005's comeback king. Believe it, Led-heads.--Thanks Stephen Humphries, George Boes
_______

I'm sure Kristen will appreciate this news, because she's a tremendous fan of all Robert's solo albums.

Alright. That may not be completely true, but it's only because she's going by the 80s stuff that Biz has, and I believe she has yet to hear 1993's Fate of Nations, which is a personal favorite of mine.

We must welcome Kristen to the blogging world - she has registered with Blogger and is presumably in the process of producing her first posts. She left two comments, but I can only find one, and the other one I would like to have explained to me.

Anyway - everyone should save their money because it looks like Plant's going to tour this spring/summer, and it's always more fun to go to great concerts in a group of friends.

Abe Update

Abe is alive and well in New Orleans. I received a call from our favorite former resident of Stockton, USA last night around 9pm. I will admit that he sounded mildly intoxicated. However, as everyone knows, it is the sincerest form of flattery to be the receipient of a friend's drunk phone call. It means in the midst of that person's good time and mellow mood, they're thinking of you.

As you know, Mardi Gras is this coming Tuesday. Predictably, the festivities have been underway for sometime down there. Abe was accosted by a religious figure of some sort shortly before he called me. Since he was walking alone, Abe theorized that is was possible that he looked lost. When I inquired if he meant lost in the spiritual or physical sense, he replied that he was not sure. I wonder how many souls are "saved" in New Orleans during this time every year...

Anyway, Abe has taken a single-bedroom apartment outside the downtown area - actually well outside - perhaps as far as 10-15 miles outside of the city, and he has a three-month lease. The apartment required him to have a job to sign the lease. Unfortunately, the job he held for one day turned out to be somewhat of a scam. From what I could gather from Abe's description, it seemed to involve managing an outfit that sold counterfeit perfumes, and the job fell through when a court ruled the company could sell the fragrance, but only under a different name.

So presently, Abe is without a job and subject to terms of a fairly expensive lease. He is actively looking for a job on a regular basis, although he may be wrapped up in the celebrations next week.

Abraham has decided on the next goal in his life, and it may take him to culinary school. That's right - Abe wants to be a chef. I, for one, can certainly see Abe in a chef's hat - cooking up a storm in a fancy kitchen somewhere.

The three-month lease will afford him the flexibility to extend his stay if he finds a job he likes, or to return relatively soon - presumably in April.

Although he has not met many people, he was nearly propositioned by a well-endowed woman who claimed it was her birthday. Abe was not taken in by the ploy for endless free drinks - he provided the woman with only one. He assured me that her breasts were larger than his head, and that, as he said, "was just one of 'em!" Remarkable, indeed.

There you have it - your Abe update. Be sure to drop Abe some birthday wishes soon - his 24th is coming up next Friday, February 11.

Pension Privatization Results in Chile

As promised earlier, here is the article from the Times about the results of privatization in Chile. If you happen to check this link after the article can no longer be read free of charge, I can send you the text in a Word file.

Essentially, the article finds that the system has been an economic success from the standpoint of the national economy. However, here's a key passage:

* "What we have is a system that is good for Chile but bad for most Chileans," said a government official who specializes in pension issues and who spoke on condition of anonymity, fearing retaliation from corporate interests. "If people really had freedom of choice, 90 percent of them would opt to go back to the old system."
Among the complaints most often heard here is that contributors are forced to pay exorbitant commissions to the pension funds. Exactly how much goes to such fees is a subject of debate, but a recent World Bank study calculated that a quarter to a third of all contributions paid by a person retiring in 2000 would have gone to pay such charges. *

The Privatization of Social Security

If you watched or listened to the State of the Union address on Wednesday, or if you've been following the news at all, you've heard about the Bush plan to privatize/"personalize" Social Security. The lingo is very much up in the air, since although Bush has been on the record for years in support of privatization, recently it's turned out that that particular word doesn't inspire confidence in the American people. So from privatizing, the push turned to "private accounts" and now to "personal accounts." Guess what? It's the same thing, just a different name. However, since poll numbers illustrate the level of public support dropping with certain terminology, the press has been pushed to adopt the less coherent, more vague "personal accounts." Some reporters have refused to do so, and they're being called biased by Republicans for shaping the debate in "Democratic" terms. The fact is, these reporters are simply calling the program what it actually is, and they're using the same terms Republicans were using just a few short months ago.

I tend to get very few comments on this blog when I discuss things like this, so obviously most of you are coming here to read about drunk girls and their antics than to hear about my politics, but hey, it's my blog and you might as well learn something while you're here. And I'm just the pretentious prick to think I can teach you something. So read on!

Essentially, the effort to privatize Social Security is a scheme to drive the stock markets up and make the people who already have a lot of money quite a bit more money. This will happen in a few different ways. This is the way I understand it. I'm not an economics major, so this will obviously be a simplification.
The money that goes into Social Security now would be diverted in part into a private account. The way the money gets invested and who does the investing will have a large effect on how much you get in the end. Fund managers will charge fees, and those fees could add up to as much as 1/3 of your contribution. What stocks are you going to invest in? What's going to affect the values of those stocks?

Let's take a small example. Let's say you work for a large company, and you're in a union. Your union is negotiating on a new contract, and part of the contract promises wage increases and increases in benefits. You know that if the contract is eventually accepted, the price of that company's stock will decrease, since the benefits for the workers will mean lower profits for the company. Are you, as a worker, in favor of higher stock prices that will benefit you in retirement - or are you in favor of the increased benefits (say they're in the form of a family dental plan and your kid is going to need braces next year)?

One of the more obvious objectives of the Bush plan is the undercutting of the labor movement in this way. But say you're not in a union and you don't care about anyone who is.

Instead, you're a mid-level executive at a marketing firm. Part of your private account is invested in x Corporation. The company is considering moving its customer service center to India to increase profits. Obviously, this would be good for the stock, but you know that your sister-in-law works at the customer service center and she has three children. She's going to lose her job, and you're going to profit from it.

I'm sure there are countless other examples, and the ones I've offered are kind of weak. I'm typing this on a break between classes. Anyway, hopefully you get the point. Any column Paul Krugman writes for the Times over the next couple months will likely be on this topic, and he can obviously explain it a lot better than I can.

A similar system of privatization to the one that Bush is proposing is already in place in Chile, and has been for the last twenty years or so. There was an article in the NYT about this just last week, and if I can find it again, I'll probably post it.

Just be aware that Bush is going to be trying to sell his program to the American public over the next few weeks, just as two years ago, he was trying to sell the danger in Iraq and the need to go to war. You'll hear him talk about the crisis in Social Security and how the program will be "flat bust" in 25 years. Never mind that we need anywhere from $3-4.5 trillion to implement his plan, which is roughly 1/3-1/2 of our ever-increasing national debt. But hey - let's give the highest income bracket another tax cut. I'm sure that will help.

Maureen Dowd Column in NYT

Plans are in the works for a Creation Museum. Perhaps all you need to know about the Creation Museum is that going to be located in "rural Kentucky." Yeah, that's right.

The philosophy of the museum? "The imprint of the Creator is all around us. And the Bible's clear - heaven and earth in six 24-hour days, earth before sun, birds before lizards. Other surprises are just around the corner. Adam and apes share the same birthday. The first man walked with dinosaurs and named them all! God's Word is true, or evolution is true. No millions of years. There's no room for compromise."

As you know, all those pesky fossils and carbon-dating methods are only put on Earth to test your faith.

Next time you're in rural Kentucky, be sure to check it out.

Groundhog Day/State of the Union

From theillustrateddailyscribble.com

The Waiter You Stiffed Has Not Forgotten - NYT Article

"I can never understand why anyone would be even the slightest bit rude to someone who is about to touch your food."

My thoughts exactly, and I have said virtually the same thing on many occasions. You don't fuck with the people that work on your car, and you don't fuck with the people who prepare or serve your food. Common sense. If you don't tip well, plan never to return to that restaurant, and hope like hell that the person you stiffed doesn't show up working at a place where you dine regularly.

The Real Thing

Three years, eight months ago. At my parents *second* wedding... June 2, 2001.

Don't ask me why I put this up. I'm just in that familiar mood yet again. I happened to be looking for a document on a disk and popped one in that I had made before leaving for Colorado two years ago, marked "Leaving Home - Last Saves," and in a folder named "sm" for soulmate was this picture. And now I've put it up on this blog. Am I a nostalgic, hypersensitive schmuck? Probably.

I'm stomping on the urge to write a lot here about this particular aspect of my life, and I still need to get a bit of work done before I can retire to my bed and what I hope will be roughly 6.5 hours of blissful dreaming. Goodnight.

Hicks

Yes, we lack universal health care and substantial public funding for higher education. And yes, we're considering amending the constitution to curtail the rights of a significant segment of the population... But who would have predicted that the United States would wind up as the backwoods swamp of the 'civilized' world?

The key passage in the article? Try this on for size (emphasis added):

"...these findings set the United States apart from all other industrialized nations, said Dr. Jon Miller, director of the Center for Biomedical Communications at Northwestern University, who has studied public attitudes toward science. Americans, he said, have been evenly divided for years on the question of evolution, with about 45 percent accepting it, 45 percent rejecting it and the rest undecided.
In other industrialized countries, Dr. Miller said, 80 percent or more typically accept evolution, most of the others say they are not sure and very few people reject the idea outright."

The provincial attitudes toward sex and religion in this country never fail to astonish me. What are people teaching their kids? All that talk about pushing America forward into the 21st century... Apparently the 21st century pushed back, and most of the country fell on their ass somewhere back in 1885.

New Look, Same Great Blog

So I've changed the template of the blog. I've done this mostly because I got sick of the profile and archive links not appearing where they were supposed to and failing in every attempt to relocate them to the proper spot.
If a majority prefers the old look, I may consider changing the format back. I like the parchment look, but I don't like the 'old wallpaper' look behind it. See what you think. The picture in the profile is, of course, of the four symbols representing Page, Jones, Bonham, and Plant respectively, from right to left. I recently downloaded that Hello program because I tired of not being able to post pictures. So I'll be trying this for a while and seeing how it works. Unfortunately, I don't have any very recent pictures of me in digital or any other format, but if and when I get a hold of one that I deem worthy of representing me to the WWW, you'll see it up there in my profile. Or maybe I'll just put a picture of Robert Plant there instead.

My Unfailing Ability To Attract Undesirables

Let's hope the person serving as the inspiration for this story never reads this. I disavow any and all responsibility for her actions if she happens to see it.

So I went to a party on Friday night. It was my friend Steve's birthday party. His birthday had actually been Tuesday of that week. Anyway, it was a fairly typical college house party. Keg in the basement, beer-pong, people trying to 'hook-up', and I actually saw some people playing Jenga. I attended the party with Matt and Thom.

At a previous party attended by some of the same people, a girl had spent quite a bit of time talking to me, seemingly whether I liked it or not. She seems like a nice enough person, but she is loud, obnoxious, and has been pretty wasted every time I've seen her, with only one exception. I have absolutely zero attraction to this girl. If I had to compare her to an actress, I would say Cameron Diaz comes the closest. Same body type and roughly the same facial structure. Unfortunately for the girl, I loathe Cameron Diaz and have an extremely difficult time watching any movie in which she appears.

Perhaps due to the amount of alcohol this girl had consumed, she found herself utterly unable to correctly grasp the proper pronunciation of my name; she stumbled through variations of Wylet, Wiley, et cetera. This was cause for great amusement among the people who knew both of us. Some reports from the previous party had attributed the girl's crying at the end of the night to her inability to obtain my phone number. Luckily, she was able to gain consolation by sleeping with someone else.

At this party, I thought things would be different, since I had done my best to convey my lack of feelings for her. Again, alcohol seemed to play a role in making sure things would go very similarly to the way they went before. By the midpoint of the party, she had unilaterally decided to write down our names as a team for beer-pong. Since she had forced me into playing the same game against her at the last party, I had an idea of her skill-level, which is to say that I knew she sucked. In the game we played against each other, she failed to make one cup. When our turn came to play this time, she was nowhere to be found. Thom filled in for her and I made my first two shots. Fortune was not on my side for long, however, as she stumbled down the basement steps to join the game just as Thom was about to take a turn. Somewhat predictably, she failed to make a single shot, and I made only one more. Apparently, the fact that she wasn't going to make any shots dawned on her and she dragged Thom back in to the game. Despite a valiant effort from Thom to tie the game, we lost in overtime.

Sensing the situation and wanting to help me out, Matt and Thom had engaged the girl in conversation earlier. She failed to remember Matt even though she had spent about 90 minutes playing cards with him at the previous party at the same house. Thom let her know that his name was "Tobey - like Tobey Maguire. In fact, you should just call me Spider-Man." Well, Matt and Spidey's first tactic was to tell her that I was gay. When this 'revelation' failed to make an impact, they changed strategy and used a new favorite: they told her that I abused women with whom I had relationships. When I was informed of these efforts, I tried to act the part around her for the rest of the night. However, it was somewhat difficult to act both effeminate and threatening simultaneously, and I feared the ruse was not being accepted.

A side note here...while Matt and Thom were trying to save me from Cameron Diaz, I was becoming involved in a conversation near the keg. A guy had seen me approach and said, "Medieval History?" I replied in the affirmative and we bantered back and forth with anecdotes about the class and the professor. I, of course, held the advantage because I had held a certain story in reserve. When I told him about the woman I knew in the class, he exclaimed,
"the ADULT LEARNER?!"
I nodded.
He said, "I fuckin' HATE her! She laughs at all of his stupid jokes, and she's always raising her hand and asking stupid questions."
I replied that I felt sure the entire class would eventually feel the same way. Just give it time.

As the night wore on, it became more and more obvious that my supposed homosexuality and tendencies toward domestic abuse were not enough to dissuade the girl from throwing herself at me. Of course, I was not the only target of the night. Matt and Thom later informed me that she had been seen making out with another random guy on the couch while I was downstairs. When she saw them, she looked mortified, caught 'red-handed' as the cliche goes.

And yet, even this was not enough.

Matt and 'Tobey' left to go to Sunny's and I stayed at the party, which was in retrospect a bad idea. Soon I was led by the hand into the now-vacated basement (the keg had been "kicked" about twenty minutes before and revelers now had to rely on the "Jungle Juice" concoction being served out of a large Rubbermaid storage container. I opted for some beer that had been hidden in the back of the refrigerator). 'Cameron' - as I shall now refer to the girl - was taking our solitude as an opportunity to express that she was "interested." I did my best to stifle my surprise. She then told me that she was going to give me her number. Suddenly, I remembered that I had to go upstairs. Right then. Somehow Cameron saw through her drunken haze and must have realized that I was trying to escape. As I was plotting my exit while in the bathroom, Cameron had been climbing the two flights of stairs to position herself directly in front of me so that she could thrust a quarter-sheet of notebook paper into my hand with a giggle. As I descended the stairs to open the front door and imbibe the cold night air, I looked down at the paper. It was covered on both sides with two variations of email addresses (Hotmail and her Fredonia account), two AOL Instant Messenger screen names, her phone number (once on each side), and her name.

Two days later, I heard that she had woken up in a car parked in a 24-hour lot with no memory of how she got there. This turned out to be an unfounded rumor. Sadly, it seemed eminently plausible when I heard it. The truth of the matter turned out to be that she had gone home with the guy with whom she had been making out earlier in the night.

This is merely one incident in a fairly well-established pattern in my life - my ability to consistently attract only women to whom I am not attracted. On rare occasions, this pattern has been broken. Most notably, this occurred when Destini approached me for the first time, in the cafeteria at JCC, where I had been sitting with Abe. Her mysterious comment to me and her rapid exit from the building led me to follow her out the door and two days later we were a couple. However, that kind of incident has unquestionably been the ultra-rare exception and not the rule.

I hope you enjoyed this story. If you haven't noticed, this blog has many functions, but a primary service it provides is the opportunity for my friends to take pleasure in the various misadventures to which I am subjected throughout my life.

Environmental Policy

Pro-Industry lobbyists have done much to shape the Bush Administration's stance on environmental policy. Bush himself has said that the jury's still out on whether global warming actually exists, and continually says that more research is needed. The only studies the Administration cites are bought and paid for by companies in the oil, coal, and factory farming industries - which is similar to relying on the results of a study on the health effects of smoking conducted by the tobacco companies.

After all, we know that the economy is much more important than the environment. Sure, the technology is available to make cars and even SUVs that get two to three times as many miles to the gallon, but that would cut into the automobile industry's profits.

Just think of all the American jobs that will be created when the air gets so dirty that we need to start building domed cities. What an economic bonanza!

If you'd like to read something depressing, pick up a copy of Robert F. Kennedy Jr.'s Crimes Against Nature. It gives an excellent synopsis of what regulations have been established and subsequently stripped, and it will give you an idea of what's to come in the next four years as humans continue to punish the planet that gave birth to them.

Here are two articles from the Times. One discusses the melting of Antarctica and the other shows how the United States operates now in negotiations with the rest of the world on environmental policy.

Here's a Real Democrat

This is what Senator Robert Byrd of West Virginia had to say on the subject of Dr. Rice's confirmation. Byrd is at least 80 years old, and has repeatedly spoken out against the Bush Administration's abuses of power.

SENATOR ROBERT BYRD: To put it plainly, Dr. Rice has asserted that the president holds far more of the war power than the Constitution grants him. This doctrine of attacking countries before a threat has fully materialized was put into motion as soon as the National Security Strategy was released. Beginning in September 2002, Dr. Rice also took a position on the front lines of the administration's efforts to hype the danger of Saddam's weapons of mass destruction. Dr. Rice is responsible for some of the most overblown rhetoric that the administration used to scare the American people into believing that there was an imminent threat from Iraq. On September 8, 2002, Dr. Rice conjured visions of American cities being consumed by mushroom clouds. On an appearance on CNN, she warned, "The problem here is that there will always be some uncertainty about how quickly he (meaning Saddam) can acquire nuclear weapons. But we don't want the smoking gun to be a mushroom cloud." That was Dr. Rice speaking. Dr. Rice also claimed that she had conclusive evidence about Iraq's alleged nuclear weapons program. During that same interview, she also said, "We do know that he is actively pursuing a nuclear weapon. We do know that there has been shipments going into Iraq, for instance, of aluminum tubes that are really only suited for nuclear weapons programs."
Well, my fellow senators, we now know that Iraq's nuclear program was a fiction. Charles Duelfer, the Chief Arms Inspector of the CIA's Iraq Survey Group, reported on September 30, 2004 as follows: “Saddam Hussein ended the nuclear program in 1991, following the Gulf War.” The Iraq Survey Group found no evidence to suggest concerted efforts to restart the program. But Dr. Rice's statements in 2002 were not only wrong; they also did not accurately reflect the intelligence reports of the time. Declassified portions of the CIA's National Intelligence Estimate from October 2002 make it abundantly clear that there were disagreements among our intelligence analysts about the state of Iraq's nuclear program. But Dr. Rice seriously misrepresented their disputes when she categorically stated, "We do know that Saddam is actively pursuing a nuclear weapon." Her allegation also misrepresented to the American people the controversy in those same intelligence reports about the aluminum tubes. Again, Dr. Rice said that these tubes were really only suited for nuclear weapons programs. But intelligence experts at the State Department and the Department of Energy believed that those tubes had nothing to do with building a nuclear weapon, and they made their dissent known in the October 2002 National Intelligence Estimate. This view, which was at odds with Dr. Rice's representations, was later confirmed by the International Atomic Energy Agency and our own CIA arms inspectors.
Well, Dr. Rice made other statements that helped to build a case for war by implying a link -- a link -- between Iraq and September 11. On multiple occasions, Dr. Rice spoke about the supposed evidence that Saddam and al Qaeda were in league with each other. For example, on September 25, 2002, Dr. Rice said on the PBS Newshour, "No one is trying to make an argument at this point that Saddam Hussein somehow had operational control of what happened on September 11. So, we don't want to push this too far. But this is a story that is unfolding and it is getting clear, and we're learning more, but, yes, there clearly are contacts between al Qaeda and Iraq that can be documented. There clearly is testimony that some of the contacts have been important contacts, and that there is a relationship there." Well, what Dr. Rice did not say was that some of those supposed links were being called into question by our intelligence agencies such as the alleged meeting between a 9/11 ring leader and an Iraqi intelligence agent in Prague that has now been debunked. These attempts to connect Iraq and al Qaeda appear to be a prime example of cherry-picking intelligence to hype the supposed threat of Iraq, while keeping contrary evidence away from the American people, wrapped up in the red tape of top secret reports.
Dr. Rice pressed the point even further, creating scenarios that threatened tens of thousands of American lives, even when that threat was not supported by intelligence. On March 9, 2003, just 11 days before the invasion of Iraq, Dr. Rice appeared -- where? -- on "Face The Nation." What did she say? She said, "Now, the al Qaeda is an organization that's quite dispersed, and quite widespread in its effects be it clearly has had linked to the Iraqis, not to mention Iraqi links to all kinds of other terrorists. And what we do not want is the day when Saddam Hussein decides that he has had enough of dealing with sanctions, enough of dealing with, quote, unquote, containment, enough of dealing with America, and it is time to end it on his terms by transferring one of these weapons just a little vial of something, to a terrorist for blackmail or for worse." Now, how scary is that? But the intelligence community had already addressed this scenario with great skepticism. In fact, the CIA's National Intelligence Estimate from October, 2002, concluded that it had low confidence -- quote, “low confidence,” close quote -- that Saddam would ever transfer any weapons of mass destruction -- weapons that he did not have, as it turned out -- to anyone outside his control.
This is yet more evidence of an abuse of intelligence in order to build the case for an unprovoked war with Iraq. And what has been the effect of the first use of this reckless doctrine of preemptive war? In the most ironic and deadly twist, the false situation described by the administration before the war, namely that Iraq was a training ground for terrorists poised to attack the United States is exactly the situation that our war in Iraq has created. But it was this unjustified war that created the situation that the President claimed he was trying to prevent. Violent extremists have flooded into Iraq from all corners of the world. Iraqis have taken up arms themselves to fight against the continuing US occupation of their country.

Is Joe Lieberman Really a Democrat?

Senator Joseph Lieberman of Connecticut, as you may recall, was the Democratic nominee for Vice-President in the 2000 election.

He was also a presidential candidate in 2004. Throughout the campaign, he seemed to present himself as a full 2.5 degrees left of George W on the political spectrum. He seemed to agree with just about everything W had said or done. I got sick of listening to him.

Lieberman had no problem with the war in Iraq - he voted to authorize the presidential use of force (does anyone notice that we don't actually DECLARE WAR anymore? That would take congressional approval. The last time war was declared was World War Two. There was no declaration of war for Korea, Vietnam, the first Gulf War, Afghanistan, or the newest Iraq war. Those "little wars" where US troops and advisers were sometimes used in Panama, Nicaragua, Grenada, et cetera? Fuhgettaboutit!).

What prompted this post? Well, it's the confirmation of Condoleezza Rice as Secretary of State, something that's expected to happen tomorrow. There was a nine-hour debate in the Senate today, with many Democrats taking the opportunity to take the Bush Administration (and Rice in particular) to task for the claims that were made during the build-up to war in 2002-2003. Perhaps you remember Rice's foreboding statement in regard to the WMD that Iraq supposedly possessed: "we don't want the smoking gun to be a mushroom cloud."

If you don't remember, then the Administration has done a good job. As in Orwell's 1984, Bush's Ministry of Truth has been working overtime to revise many parts of history. No, the US didn't go to war because Iraq had WMD. We wanted to bring democracy to the Middle East. Riiiight. And we certainly don't want any of their oil. And we certainly won't be establishing our largest foreign military bases there. Sure.

Anyway, here's how Lieberman feels about the lovable Condi Rice:
'Lieberman, speaking on the Senate floor, said one of Rice's main strengths is that "the world knows that she has the president's trust and confidence." He urged the Senate to "resoundingly endorse this nomination and send the message to friend and foe alike that while we have our disagreements, ultimately what unites us around this very qualified nominee in this hour of war is much greater than what divides us."'

What a load of crap.

Here's the whole article.

Hey, Not All Christians are Intolerant Psycho Nutjobs...

Yes, I was surprised too.

The link below comes from www.talkingpointsmemo.com, which is one of my favorite sources for news and commentary.

Apparently, the United Church of Christ supports SpongeBob, and would like to welcome him into their fold. The UCC came under fire from more conservative Christian groups recently because of a commercial they intended to run. The ad emphasized the welcoming and accepting nature of Christ and made it known that UCC would welcome everyone, even (GASP!) gays and lesbians, to worship with them. Two television networks have refused to run the ad, claiming that it is "too controversial." With church membership and attendance dropping in virtually all industrialized nations (read: almost all of Europe, as well as Canada. The US rates for church attendance have been fairly stagnant over the past few decades), it seems like more churches would be willing to open their doors a little wider. Guess not.

From my limited knowledge of the New Testament and of Christ's teachings in general, the UCC certainly seems to be much more in tune with what Jesus had to say than some of the other more conservative denominations (read: Intolerant Psycho Nutjobs).

A quick search revealed that UCC also supports a woman's right to choose. Extraordinary. And check this out. Amazing.

More Right-Wing Extremism and Stupidity

Many of you have heard about this absurd 'controversy' over SpongeBob. This is an editorial by Maureen Dowd of the Times that is obviously written by a person with some sanity.

Medieval Nightmare

I think I mentioned previously that I was not looking forward to taking Medieval History II. I now have one more excellent reason to drop the class.

I walked into class with a kid I had two classes with last semester. We were talking about the professor. The kid (I believe his name is Michael Braxton) has had classes with him before. Dr. Thomas Morrissey. He seems rather eccentric. Anyway - he's not the problem.

I was about ten minutes early for class (funny how much my habits change from early in the semester to later on...). About three minutes after I got there, I heard my name exclaimed from the far side of the room. I hesitated to turn, not really believing my ears. I slowly turned toward the source of the outburst. It was as I feared. Standing and waving excitedly with a huge grin on her face (and her normal amount of eye make-up required for leaving the house) was Destini's mother, Lori.

Yep. My ex-girlfriend's mother is in my class. Does this kind of shit happen to anyone else? No? I didn't think so.

Before I go trashing the woman, I will say that at many points during and after my relationship with Des, Lori was nice to me. Not necessarily on a regular basis or anything, but there were occasions. She bought fifth-row tickets for Destini and I to see Robert Plant in Toronto. She also made sure to say before and after the event exactly how much she paid for the tickets... She could often be very generous, but she never quite let you forget about it, if you know what I mean. And many people are like that.
The problems that Destini and I usually had with her mother involved occasions when she wanted to exert her control over her daughter (Des and I were 19, 20, and 21 when we went out). She was one of the primary impetuses behind our attempted move to Durango, Colorado in August 2001. She was also the reason that Des decided to move in with her grandmother when we came back to New York instead of moving back into her house. I won't go over the many times when Lori would not allow Destini and I to see each other or the idiotic curfews she imposed from time to time. Those complaints will sound quite childish now. Essentially, she is almost a textbook example of a bipolar (manic depressive) person. She was directly responsible for many of Destini's mood swings as well, just by being very demanding and controlling. Des was a very sensitive person. I can't say what she's like now, although I know she's changed. But some of that blame must also be attributed to me.

All that said, Lori has not exactly had an easy go of it in life. She's had to deal with a lot of shitty things that have happened to her that were not her fault. Many times, she made me feel very much at home at their house, obviously those were the times when she was in a good mood. I have fond memories of sitting down to great dinners and being comfortable as part of the family.

See...when I encountered her today, it was mostly the bad things that I remembered, but when I looked back on the whole time I was with Des, I certainly can't dismiss her as an entirely negative force. However, she did make things difficult for us a significant amount of the time.

Anyway, so I felt that I had to cross the room and say hello. The first thing she did was hug me, tell me that I was looking good, and asked if I had been "pumping iron." Keep in mind that we were basically standing in front of one side of the class. Then picture my reaction to such an embarrassing interaction. Yeah. I'm sure people were staring, but I didn't have the guts to look around and confirm that suspicion. So then I got the update on everyone in the family (excluding Destini, who is presumably still living with the cokehead she moved in with after she and I broke up, although last I knew, she was not actually "with" him anymore. I guess she goes out a lot. Did I mention she's changed quite a bit?) and what she was doing in the class. I have very little recollection of the conversation, because I was just trying to reconcile this monstrous development in my life. Now I'm going to walk around campus dreading random unexpected encounters. I was completely thrown off for the remainder of the class, barely able to focus on what the professor was saying. I was able to hear her laugh above all others when Morrissey told amusing anecdotes. Later, she was the only one to raise her hand and offer some inconsequential tidbit about her own life - something about an aunt in 1962 - which might signal that besides her mere presence being an enormous distraction to me, she might also be one of those garrulous "adult learners"/"non-traditional students" who seeks to dominate every class discussion (and would therefore become a distraction to the entire class and not just to me).

I have this to look forward to three times every week. I'm not sure I can take it. It might be worth checking into alternatives that would satisy whatever history major requirement that this class is meeting for me.

What a Mess

During the 2004 Presidential campaign, you may recall that protesters were often surrounded by Bush supporters and drowned out by chants of "Four More Years." Yesterday at the inauguration, protesters were drowned out by chants of "USA, USA."

I could launch into the striking similarity between Bush supporters and fans of the WWF's Hacksaw Jim Duggan (who was a "good guy," but never a real intellectual...). Duggan's fans used to chant USA at every opportunity, somewhat confusingly, since his opponents were often from the same country.

We have officially reached a point where the president's supporters regard themselves as patriots, defenders of the faith, guardians of liberty, et cetera. This has, of course, been implied for years. It's just getting worse. Dissent and you are labeled anti-American.

I get so angry, but I feel like I am just saying the same things over and over with very little effect. People tend to fall into three categories when I make these types of statements. They either nod and agree and we step into a dialogue in which we basically just parrot the other person. Preaching to the choir.
Some people will argue, but not for long. Usually they pick one issue and repeat themselves endlessly in slightly different ways, and do not really listen to any opposing views. They may shut up for a few seconds, but only to think of a different way to say the same thing...
And other people will quietly back away because they don't know what the hell is going on.

I find this situation slightly analogous to one of many instances where my father offered some "words of wisdom." Sometimes what he says doesn't make a lot of sense at first, but often if you give it some thought, it turns out to be pretty accurate. I've grown to respect my dad a lot more over the years for his experience and his worldview. Anyway - he told me once that there were three kinds of people in the world:
There are the people who make things happen, people who watch what happens, and other people who have no idea what the fuck just happened.
I know - it's a slight variation of lead, follow, or get out of the way. But I like it.

Alright. I'm tired and I have three classes today. So I'm going to get some sleep. Maybe I'll get a little more ambitious and say something meaningful sometime. Maybe. Goodnight, folks.

An American in Paris - Thomas Friedman Editorial

Excerpt:
"Watching George Bush's second inaugural from a bistro in Paris is like watching the Red Sox win the World Series from a sports bar in New York City. Odds are that someone around you is celebrating - I mean, someone, somewhere in Europe must be happy about this - but it's not obvious.
Why are Europeans so blue over George Bush's re-election? Because Europe is the world's biggest "blue state." This whole region is a rhapsody in blue. These days, even the small group of anti-anti-Americans in the European Union is uncomfortable being associated with Mr. Bush. There are Euro-conservatives, but, aside from, maybe, the ruling party in Italy, there is nothing here that quite corresponds to the anti-abortion, anti-gay, anti-tax, anti-national-health-care, anti-Kyoto, openly religious, pro-Iraq-war Bush Republican Party."
Read the whole editorial here.

Protests at the Inauguration

Back To School

I have class in ten hours or so. Just one class today. On Friday I'll have three, and on Mondays and Wednesdays, I'll have four. Good times? We'll see.

On Tuesdays and Thursdays, I have The Cold War from 11am to 12:20pm. Looks like it may be a large class. Well, I just looked it up. Fifty people. I know that's not a large class at a big school, but it's a big class for an upper level course at Fredonia. It's being co-taught by two professors, one of whom I've had before. It should be an interesting class. This is pretty much my primary area of interest in history, and if I turn out to be a history teacher someday, this would be my ideal concentration.

On Monday, I'll start with Medieval History II at 11-11:50am. I'm not looking forward to this class. I can't really recall why I took it in the first place. The "Middle Ages" period is probably my least favorite period of history. Knights and castles are cool, but overall it's a very bleak time in my estimation. Perhaps I'll have have a change of heart after this class, but I'm not betting on it.
Then I have Science Fiction from 12-12:50pm, which is an English class. I read a ton of sci-fi books when I was younger, so I'm kind of looking forward to this class and I hope it won't be too writing-intensive. I'm looking to it as kind of a break from the essays and reports I'll be doing for my History and Poli-Sci classes. We'll see. I've already got the reading list for that class. Maybe I'll post it sometime. I've read two of the books already - Red Mars (which is book one of a trilogy) and Bradbury's The Martian Chronicles, but I read both of them a long time ago. I'm in the class with Theresa from my Modern British Lit class from last semester. We got to be good friends, and I think Steve's in the class as well, so that should make it a lot more tolerable.
I have a break after that class, although just until 2pm, when I have Media and Politics until 2:50. That class should be great. Rankin is a very popular professor, and I think I have quite a bit to say on the subject. We'll see if others do as well, or if the professor happens to agree with my politics. But hey, he's educated and informed, so he must be a leftist, right?
On Mondays and Wednesdays, I'll also have a fourth class, from 3-4:20pm, which could be a killer if it's not interesting. I tend to fall asleep very quickly in classes where I'm not very "into it." But this class should be good. It's The 1960s with Richard Filipink. Filipink's kind of a young guy, and this is going to sound a little gay, but he's got hair like I'd like to have if and when I grow mine out again. Or at least he used to. He may have cut it. That was two years ago. I think he's from down south, but I'm not completely sure. Anyway, he's a good teacher and hopefully it'll be a good class.

So I should try to get some sleep. Perhaps I'll have something to say tomorrow.

Blogging on the Job

As the title of the post suggests, I'm at Sears right now. And you know it's incredibly busy if I'm doing this...

So let's talk about the Wendy-Amy-Aaron connection, shall we?

Let's go back to New Year's Eve at Turck's place. Turck was there of course (at least in body if not in mind after about 1:30 or so when he passed out downstairs). Also in attendance: Turck's girlfriend Lindsey, her friends, including Samantha Harris (formerly of Sears) wearing what looked to be a pink silk lingerie top under a tiny little coat (in other words, she was being herself)....Randy & Laura, Wendy & Joe, Matt, Thom, and then me.
According to an IM conversation relayed to me by Aaron, Amy Gustafson contended that I had acted in accordance with my usual "ass" personality at Turck's place and I supposedly punched Matt in his bad knee and was generally drunk and abusive. I use the phrase 'drunk and abusive' because it appears in The Big Lebowski, when The Dude is ejected from Jackie Treehorn's Garden Party and is assaulted by the chief of police of Malibu (peaceful beach community). "Jackie Treehorn draws a lot of water in this town, Lebowski. You don't draw shit."

Anyway, the thing is that nothing happened that could even have been taken out of context and misconstrued into something like this (or so I thought). Wendy has subsequently admitted to "possibly" allowing Amy to draw some incorrect conclusions about what took place on New Year's Eve.

Matt was at my apartment when Aaron called and told me about his IM conversation. Matt decided that he must have "battered-wife syndrome" and consequently was able to block the entire event out of his memory.

In the meantime, however...I think I do a good enough job of acting like a jerk on my own without someone having to make things up about me and telling other people about it. Maybe I'm wrong. Excuse me while I beat these elderly people with this crowbar. First I'll crack up those oxygen tanks they were wheeling around with them.

Oh. No, that didn't really happen. Did it?

I just wanted to publicly thank everyone who may or may not have been involved with that little incident.

Sincerely,

me

So...

So I've had quite a few ideas for posts lately, but with no computer, it's been kind of tough to get them on the site. And now, unfortunately, is not really the time. I'm over at Brett's house and Brett is passed out on his couch (too much Adult Swim on Cartoon Network) and it's a little late.

So I'm going to be driving home now. Perhaps I'll be able to get to a computer sometime next week. Just in time to get back to school. Yay.

Art's Broke

So this was on the Everclear mailing list...



From Today's edition of The Oregonian

(http://www.oregonlive.com/entertainment/oregonian/index.ssf?/base/entertain

ment/110518934484020.xml)



Rocker Art Alexakis files for bankruptcy in California court



Portland's biggest rock star has filed for bankruptcy.



Art Alexakis, who as the leader of the band Everclear has toured the world

and made million-selling CDs, filed for Chapter 11 debt reorganization last

week in United States Bankruptcy Court, Central District of California.

ALEXAKIS



The filing last Tuesday, under the name Arthur Paul Alexakis, listed a

Venice, Calif., address, though it also contains items related to his

Southeast Portland residence.



An outgoing message on Alexakis' voice mail said he was in Mexico. The

singer, his manager and his attorney for the bankruptcy did not immediately

return calls seeking comment.



According to the filing, Alexakis owes a federal tax bill for the years

1999, 2001 and 2002 of $2.75 million, as well as nearly $230,000 to the

Oregon Department of Revenue and more than $120,000 in credit card debt

spread over several accounts.



Although Alexakis was divorced last year for the third time, there is no

indication in the filings that alimony or child support have played a role

in his financial straits.



In an interview with The Oregonian last August, Alexakis repeatedly said

that the past year had been difficult, and that stress had contributed to

his losing 40 pounds. An outspoken supporter of Democratic candidates and

causes, he said that he wasn't able to make political campaign contributions

as large as he had in the past.



During the period when his tax debt originated, Alexakis was experiencing

his greatest commercial success. The album "So Much for the Afterglow,"

released in October of 1997, was certified double-platinum (indicating U.S.

sales of 2 million copies) by the following year, and the group was doing

strong business as a touring act. "Songs From an American Movie, Vol. 1:

Learning How to Smile," from 2000 also went platinum, the third Everclear

release to reach that status.



But the band's album sales have since plummeted. According to figures

supplied by Capitol Records, 2003's "Slow Motion Daydream" has sold a little

more than 100,000 copies, and "Ten Years Gone: The Best of Everclear

1994-2004" has sold less than 40,000 copies since it came out in October. --

Marty Hughley







Eric Keown



Hungry & Hollow



http://www.hungryandhollow.com

Hmmmmm

So I'm away for a few days...my profile disappears and so apparently have all my posts before December 13. I'm going to go ahead and blame Brett for this, because I'm sure he'll appreciate it. We tried to move my recalcitrant profile up from the bottom of the screen and everything looked great. Now, a few days later, everything's gone.

I haven't been keeping up with the news much without a computer. I've been up in Fredonia watching 3 or 4 movies per day, going to bed at 3 or 4am and rising at just after 2pm. I'm at my parents' house now, preparing to go to The Office to meet....well, we'll see who shows up, I guess. Matt's not going - he claims it's too nasty outside. Well, I drove from Fredonia. It wasn't a picnic, but I made it.

I don't know if this post will go through or not, or whether it will kick my profile back on the page. I don't know what happened.